Bark or Treat

So a lot of people have been wondering if I am dressing up for Halloween this year.  Well I actually hadn’t given it a lot so I don’t have a costume.  Some people had suggested that Thomas fit me with some hot dog buns… how original, I know… but I don’t want to just be another wiener dog in a hot dog outfit, like my friends that participated in Oktoberfest in downtown Cincinnati.

So I am using the blog to request your suggestions of costumes.  You can leave comments on this page or send your ideas via email through my master’s website.  I’m looking forward to seeing what you come up with, I’m sure you’re a creative bunch!

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The Elusive Perfect Spot

I’ve noticed that as the weather has gotten worse, namely colder with the consistent rain over the past few days, my master has increasingly lost patience with me when I go outside to take care of business.  Let me explain something to you humans.  Much like you take a good book, newspaper, or magazine into the stall with you (Bryan, I know you do…), we dogs need to find the perfect spot outside. 

Humans read while you sit on your throne.  Dogs sniff their surroundings.  It is a basic necessity that we have something good to sniff just as you need something good to read when taking care of business. 

So I hope everyone out there will try to give their own dogs some leniency when attending to official hygene duties, and let us “take our reading materials with us” by letting us sniff the ground around us.  The sooner we find a spot, the sooner we can get you back inside to watch those old Whose Line is it Anyway reruns, or Soap Network.

Ok, I’m really not trying to bring the quality of my writing down a notch but there’s something that needed to be addressed… now that I have spoken my peace on this I will try to keep the content in top quality, without the potty mouth or dirty jokes (no pun intended).

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Ariane Belongs in a Bucket

I recall… the last time I can remember seeing Ariane, the blonde human who drove the dented and mangled Toyota (a.k.a. Kitty Freightliner), was back in August when she put me in a wooden bucket out behind the house.  That bucket is now filled with dead flowers that were scorched by the summer heat.  Had it not been for my all knowing, caring, and compassionate master who pulled me from that bucket, that could’ve been me laying there dead in the bucket and not those flowers that are there for me to pee on now!  It gives a little added meaning to pushing up daisies, huh.  Oh where oh where could this Ariane chick have run off to?! 

I recall… some good times with her.  She was the one holding me up at Fountain Square, where I got to play statue in front of the fountain.  She needs to come back down here and take me to the Woods.  Until she does so, she should consider herself in the doghouse, hence you will note I have filed this entry under I recall and Doghouse.

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Starting a new blog series…

So I’m starting this new category of blog entries.  It’s called, I recall.  Quite simply, as I’m beginning to grow up and reflect on my early puppyhood - when I had my skunk-like black stripe - I begin to think about the things I’ve seen, the things I’ve smelled, the things I’ve done. 

I will be blogging about those things in little brief entries periodically.  I hope you will comment on the things that I’ve experienced and share with me your thoughts on things you’ve done that are similar, or reflect back on times that you’ve shared with me.  I’m looking forward to adding more categories in the future…

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Be Proud of Me…

…. I resisted every urge and temptation in my 11 lb body to name that last blog entry “Raining Cats and Dogs”.  Not only would that be too over the top and cheesy/corny (cheese I like, corn… not so much), it has cats listed before dogs, and that just ain’t right… you heard me, I said ain’t… regardless how you feel about grammar, you know what I’m sayin’ is true.

Holla.  Rub my belly, leave me some comments!!!

Start Building the Ark

Day 1 of the 40 days/40 nights…

Maybe it’s just because I’m only 8 months old, but this seems like an awful lot of rain to get all at once.  Keep in mind that means I have basically never seen rain before since apparently Cincinnati does not get any of that in the summer! 

It’s been raining allllllll day.  My master tried to force me to go outside before he left for work.  I got to about the second step and came to a screeching halt because it felt like I was getting spit on… or slobbered on by Harry.  I nearly sent my master end over end down the stairs as he wasn’t expecting me to stop. 

That part I liked :-D 

But I turned and looked up, and that ARFhole had some black Mary Poppins contraption covering him and keeping him dry!  Guess what the jerk did first thing as soon as he came home tonight… tried to take me out into the pouring rain AGAIN!  What is it with this guy?! 

Well, I decided there was yet another good thing about not being fixed.  And that is - if we do need to take two of each animal, I get to go in the boat… and I had better get to pick which chick I take with me, too!!! (That reminds me… Carmen, we need to talk sometime!)

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Writing is Very Difficult; But Very Gratifying

I am most grateful to my loyal readers whom often provide me fodder for my blog.  You encourage me to scribble more thoughts down than if I would otherwise ramble on about my mundane puppy life in Cincinnati, Ohio in total disregard for the readers’ interest.

Dolce, a fellow pup and faithful reader… I can say faithful because let’s face it, dogs are mankind’s best friend and the most loyal of the animal kingdom…  Anyway, Dolce posed a question about what would be beneficial in starting a blog or website.  Certainly I agree it is difficult to type with these waffle iron-like paws.  Then there is the slobber on the keyboard. 

Some would argue you should get a degree in Journalism or take a creative writing course.  That’s about as useful as burying your favorite bone in the neighbor’s yard.  Some other dog is just going to steal your bone or the neighbor is going to run it over with the loud green contraption.  It says Deere on the side but it’s much louder and slower than the deer that I’ve seen in the neighborhood.  Alas, I digress.

I do not consider myself to be the authority on what you should do to take up blogging.  I learned every thing I know from Mr. Aaron Forgue, Harry’s master.  Aaron is a computer guru and introduced me to a product that has made blogging and publishing on the web so easy.  It’s called WordPress.  It has a lot of the features of Microsoft Word but is accessed through a browser and makes publishing online very easy.

But I do think that while technology has enabled us to transport the spoken word from the pen to the keyboard, there is still so much we can learn by reflecting on the classic, accomplished authors.  For instance, Mark Twain said, “Substitute ‘damn’ every time you’re inclined to write ‘very;’ your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.”  Another famous writer, Nathaniel Hawthorne, said, “Easy reading is damn hard writing.”  Nathaniel Hawthorne obviously didn’t have to answer to an editor if we are to believe Mark Twain.  I obviously do have to answer to an editor as you can tell by reading the title to this entry.

Some final, and personal, thoughts on blogging.  It’s like any other thing in life.  You have to like what you do.  And I like to blog.  Hence the tagline on the website is I’m just a dog that likes to blog…  I will also stress that you should be brief as people don’t like to read novels online (some advice that I didn’t take in this particular blog posting)!!!  People like a lot of pictures, too.  I have some more pictures to upload.  Some of these go back to Labor Day weekend 9/2/07.  So perhaps I will upload those with any Halloween pictures that I take!  Until then, happy blogging!

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Rubber Duckie You’re the One

Guess who just had a nice bath!!!  That’s right… I got to use the moisturizing shampoo!  No more doggie dandruff for this guy.  And I don’t know how my feather covered duck friends can stand being in the water, it’s awful! 

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I (Briefly) Went Wireless

Well, as you may have noticed, it has been nearly a month since I last wrote an entry on my blog… a lot has happened in that past month!  For instance, over Labor Day weekend I managed to break free from the shackles that normally confine me to my yard and I managed to tour my entire neighborhood while Master roamed the streets looking for me.  I also proceeded to get several pieces of rubber (from a squeaky toy) lodged in my stomach and got to spend the night in the hospital.  Hey, if you’re not suppose to eat it, don’t make it look like steak.  sheesh.

 But earlier this week I “inadvertently” chewed my USB cable that connects my laptop to my broadband modem in half.  Once again, if it wasn’t meant to be eaten…. don’t put it on the floor!  So I now have a new cable and I’m back to my blogging.  I apologize for the time away.  I will try to only chew on Master’s tv, phone, fridge, and cell phone charger cords from now on.  That way I won’t interrupt the connection to those of you out there in cyberland.  Yes, I’m in the doghouse as the category of this post indicates.

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